


Hold me

by Kibounohane



Category: Johnny's Entertainment, NewS (Band)
Genre: Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, M/M, Non-Consensual Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-13
Updated: 2018-12-13
Packaged: 2019-09-17 13:11:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16975200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kibounohane/pseuds/Kibounohane
Summary: Koyama was lonely.





	Hold me

Hard lights hit Shige in the face when he shoved himself through the crowd of the full gay club in Nichoume at 2am after receiving a text from Koyama saying he was not feeling well and if Shige could give him a ride.

 

It was not one of the things Shige did on a daily basis, but picking up a lost Koyama from somewhere kind of was so he was used to it. What troubled him was the wording and something about Koyama not feeling well. Maybe he'd just drunk too much.

 

Koyama was leaning against the black wall in front of the toilet, hands on his knees, gasping. Shige took immediate action and hooked him in an embrace so he could carry him outside to get some fresh air. 

 

"Do you have all of your stuff?" He yelled against the noise of the banging bass beat, and Koyama nodded weakly.

 

People were also standing around outside, smoking and chattering, and Shige shoved Koyama around the corner into an alley where a male couple was making out, not caring about anything.

 

"Kei!" Shige exclaimed as Koyama was about to sack down in front of him, too weak to stand up.

 

In his desperation, Shige slapped Koyama in the face. It didn't help much though and he immediately regretted it when he heard Koyama's whimper.

 

"I'm so tired," Koyama uttered, "Shige"

 

"Shige," Koyama whispered, everything blurry and spinning, "where are you, Shige?"

 

"I'm right here, Kei, it's okay, I got you." 

 

Koyama nodded and smiled before he felt his knees going weak, and his vision faded.

 

* * *

 

Sunbeams hit his face hard and Koyama groaned. It was morning and he was in Shige's bed, alone. He heard noises from the kitchen and then Shige returned with a tablet of breakfast.

 

"Good morning," he said. "How are you feeling?"

 

Koyama sat up and rubbed his head. "I am not sure. Okay, I guess. Got a slight headache."

 

"You got knocked you off pretty badly, can you recall what happened?"

 

Koyama shook his head. It was too much of an effort to try to remember anything from last night. 

 

"I talked to a lot of guys last night. Many flirted with me. Man, I dunno, it just...."

 

He grabbed the pillow hard, smashing it in front of his face half because of anger and embarressment.

 

"Maybe someone put something in your drink. Eat something," Shige said and placed the tablet on the table. 

 

"It's quite embarressing. I hope I didn't throw up in your car or something?"

 

"Nope"

 

"Good, I would hate myself."

 

Koyama got out of bed.

 

* * *

 

They ate in silence until Koyama burst.

 

"I'm so happy you found me, seriously," he started to sob, "Shige, I... I think I love you or something"

 

Shige smiled, munching on his bread. Koyama dug his chopsticks into his rice bowl and sniffed.

 

"I'm okay with that," Shige teased and Koyama pouted.

 

"Come on," Shige said, "I can be at least a bit jealous you were throwing yourself at some random guys out there"

 

Koyama looked on the table. "I .. was trying to forget"

 

"Forget what?"

 

"Not so long ago I partied with someone, and he took me home, and we.. did it. But it was awful."

 

Shige put his bread down.

 

"I was lonely, craving affection. But the first thing he did when we entered his appartment and I was sitting on the couch was shoving his crotch in my face." Koyama's voice became quieter. "I hate that I was so easy, but I guess I'm just lonely. Yet, I love sex. You know? But still... When we had done it, he came, but I hadn't yet, he was too high and came so fast and I was not even ready yet. It had started to feel good somehow but he already pulled out, and sat next to me on his bed and you know what he said?"

 

"Hm?" Shige listened carefully.

 

"'I gained weight'," Koyama continued, "and then he looked at his pathetic figure in the mirror and patted his stomach, even though there was no fat whatsoever. I lay my head on his shoulder and tried to somehow show him that I would liked to be touched more, was that selfish of me? He just shook his head and said 'I think that doesn't match the mood now' and I felt sick in that moment. I grabbed my clothes and got dressed, he escorted me to the door and quickly said bye, I felt like he threw me out, the faster I was gone the better, is what he probably thought. At least that's what it felt like. I felt like a whore."

 

"Kei..." Shige said.

 

Koyama fell silent. 

 

"What an asshole," Shige then said, "but you know, one night stands can turn out bitterly."

 

"I don't need a lecture now," Koyama snarled, and Shige blinked.

 

"Well, what is it then that you need from me, huh?" Shige said louder, "after all I did for you, and you never look at me, I pick you up and bring you here and save your ass!"

 

"I just need you to hold me, okay?" Koyama blurted out and tears shot into his eyes, "it's all I ever wanted, really! Just you!"

 

For a moment, they said nothing before Shige got up and pulled Koyama up by the collar. They stared at each other hard and it was like the last decades flew by before Koyama fell into Shige's embrace, his head nuzzling into his neck and Shige stroked his hair.

 

After a moment, Koyama looked up and Shige's expression in his face had changed and they were close, closer than ever before. That's when their lips met for the very first time.

Soft, pliant, full of confused feelings, and attraction. Everything pressed together in one kiss. It was too much for Koyama and he broke away.

 

"I have to think about this," he said as his hands supported his weight on Shige's chest, still feeling a bit dizzy.

 

"I understand," Shige said, "I'll wait for you. I'll wait for you for as long as you need."

 

And with that, Koyama packed his things and said goodbye, for now, but to his heart it felt like it was just the beginning.


End file.
